“She failed all her courses last semester and begged the teacher for a passing grade.”
“I heard he was dating that senior.”
“Did you see what she is wearing today?”

Sounds familiar? Maybe you have heard this kind of whisper in class or while sipping tea in the canteen. Maybe even you have also joined in. But what if you were the one being talked about like that? What if your name was being dragged across lunch tables and classrooms based on something someone heard from someone else?

Gossiping has become such an everyday activity in our university lives that we hardly realise how cruel it can be. It starts as “just sharing,” but what begins as a normal conversation quickly turns into gossip throughout entire departments. We often treat it as innocent adda, but it can have severe consequences. We might be ruining someone’s mental peace without even knowing about it.

In Bangladeshi universities, public or private alike, we are no strangers to the gossip culture. There is always a new story. Who is dating whom. Who failed. Who got caught cheating. This culture is so normalised that we rarely stop asking questions. We treat it as a form of entertainment. But it is not just entertainment, not for the person at the centre of the said entertainment.

People who are involved in gossiping are often left emotionally drained. According to studies and psychological research, gossiping can lead to anxiety, depression, panic attacks, and even PTSD. 

It might sound dramatic at first but it will make sense if you give it some thought. Being constantly paranoid about what people are saying about you behind your back and not being able to walk into a classroom without feeling like all the eyes are on you! This has to have an effect on a person.

Personally, I struggle to trust people who are always gossiping. If someone constantly gossips about others to me, how can I be sure they are not doing the same about me? There is a sort of artificiality that creeps into that friendship. It leads me to try to avoid conflict, please people, overthink, and try to stay in the “safe zone,” and that is exhausting.

The most unfortunate thing about gossip is that once it spreads, it is almost impossible to reverse the whole thing. The damage to someone’s reputation is inevitable. Does not matter if it was false. Does not matter if you were “just joking”. Does not matter if it was based on a half-truth or a total lie. The fact is, people often will believe what they hear. They will not ask, “Is this even true?” They will just assume it is and move on.

Gossip destroys lives. It not only influences how someone is treated by friends, teachers and even strangers but also changes how they are seen at events, in class, in clubs, in every social interaction. Once a person’s name is tied to a scandal, it sticks. We often think, “I am just repeating what I heard.” But that is the thing. It keeps spreading. One more person hears it. One more person believes it. And the person at the centre? They are the ones who suffer.

Let’s be better than this. Let’s choose kindness over curiosity. Let’s not mindlessly gossip.